Me: We're having Lasgna for dinner, its yummy come try!
Maia: No it's yucky...
...How about Pizza Noodles?
oh that's yummy!
Daddy: Remember Baby Kicking in Mamas tummy? You know that's baby Londyn right?
M: Yes I want a baby kicking in my tummy.
Hehehe Well when you grow big and strong and get married you can have a baby kicking.
Ok I get big muscles for baby in my tummy
M: Mommy mommy I want more blue boobies!!
Me: ....You want what?
Blue boobies blue boobies blue boobies so yummy!
...show me what you're talking about, k?
-she runs and grabs a box-
OH you want more blueberries?
YES blueboobies okAY?
Did you poop your pants?
M: No I stinky bum.
So you DID poop
No I stinky
Our friends sent us a gift for the girls and when I let Maia open her portion she got super excited and yelled:
M: jammies and and lipstip!!
(dora pajamas and chapstick)
Sunday, March 25, 2012
Friday, March 9, 2012
Londyn Marie
For those of you who are interested here is the story of how our little Londyn came to us!
So I was having regular contractions for just over a week, and my docs assured me this "just happens, sometimes it lasts for weeks" at the thought of it continuing on for weeks I cried. I just want to meet this baby! I jut felt like she was ready and then the contractions would die down. It was really difficult for me to handle. I asked Jesse for a blessing and was assured I would know when the time was right.
One night I went to bed with contractions 3 minutes apart I was very excited, when I woke up the next morning and they were back to 15 min I was pretty distraught. Then the next night went more like this I went to bed fine and woke up with terrible contractions! They were about 6 minutes apart but I tried not to get excited, but Jesse didn't get much sleep either. So as is protocol with my OB office soon as they opened I called to go get a labor check. Packed my bag and headed to the office! However nothing had changed, no more dilation no change in how often the contractions were coming no sign of leaking anything and baby was handling contractions well. So we went home.
Pretty much I was done. I put away any notion of using a stop watch and just went about what needed doing. Which was spending time with my family! My mom was here visiting and Jesse had the week off so we watched movies and shopped and things like that.
Early early Sunday morning the same thing woke me up, and I tried to get as much sleep as I could, positive it was another 'false alarm' One time during this alarm I went and used the bathroom, when I came back and sat down on the bed I felt a little trickle and to my self I was like "too good to be true that that could be my water breaking...so I'll assume it's nothing unless it happens again" then I changed my underwear and went back to bed. In the morning I told Jesse all about my rough night and decided I would let him make the decision whether to go into the hospital and get checked or not. He said "whats the worst that could happen we come home?" Yes that's exactly the worst that could happen went right through my head. But I called the office and sorta took my time getting my stuff together. Maia started freaking out (as had kinda been the thing over the past week) so when I got out to the car I didn't have the bag and thought Jesse would grab it. When we got there we realized neither of s had it. Then I was like "Oh well best way to get to stay is to come unprepared right?"
So I went about sitting in the observation room and nearly didn't mention the little gush I'd had early that morning. But I'd mentioned it to Jesse and he made sure I mentioned it. They were unimpressed but said they'd check for amniotic fluid anyway. I was still at a 4, discouraging, and after an hour of monitoring they told me to take a walk in the hall while waiting to see what the test said. We walked for a bit but then went back to the triage room and played hangman on the Kindle.
When they came back and told me test was positive for fluid I about cried. I'm NOT going home empty handed!!
I was admitted and all set up in my room around 11am. They recommended breaking my water the rest of the way to get contractions rolling and I said sure. They were very impressed by the rupture and the I quote "waterfall" that ensued. Contractions sure did speed up! Every 3 minutes like instantly and holy cow were they different but I tried to endure. And after an hour or so I was pretty weak and had hardly progressed at all so I opted for an epidural. Lucky me the anesthesiologist was near by and I didn't have to wait too long by 1:45 it was in! Immediately contractions picked up to be a minute apart for about twenty minutes, I could still feel them, they just didn't hurt as bad, miraculous I tell you. They dimmed the lights and I tried to get some sleep, since I'd missed a bunch during the night anyway. 2:30pm they came to check on things and helped me adjust to a new position, then they needed to move the monitors to keep track of heartbeat etc. They checked me and I'd jumped to an 8 dilated! But as they were trying to get the monitor to pick up baby for more than a minute they had me shifting a lot and all that made me nauseated. So of course I threw up, but was glad I hadn't eaten for a few hours except for ice chips that made things not too yucky.
Since throwing up during labor is common and is known to cause dilating they went to check me again to see if it'd helped and whataya know there's a baby! So they went to get the baby team and all the gear and we all looked over at Jesse on the couch. He was keeping family updated as they were adjusting things, and missed the part where they said they could see baby's head. So he jumped up and came over and they got their stuff together and I started pushing. 20 minutes later Jesse was able to catch baby Londyn. She apparently was trying come out face up which is not good so everyone got to watch her turn herself 180 degrees to be in better position, there was lots of "I've never seen this" and "this is really amazing to watch" comments but I tried not to look too much into it :)
Londyn was born hungry! I was able to nurse her pretty much immediately, had to tear her away to clamp and cut the cord a while later. Once placenta was delivered they got a look at things, her cord was attached at the side (which made me nervous earlier on because of the same issue my friend had and she's lost 2...) but the sac was huge. There was so much fluid that it was keeping baby from coming on her own. She couldn't get pressure on the cervix like is needed cuz she was too afloat. But she did make it!
So I was having regular contractions for just over a week, and my docs assured me this "just happens, sometimes it lasts for weeks" at the thought of it continuing on for weeks I cried. I just want to meet this baby! I jut felt like she was ready and then the contractions would die down. It was really difficult for me to handle. I asked Jesse for a blessing and was assured I would know when the time was right.
One night I went to bed with contractions 3 minutes apart I was very excited, when I woke up the next morning and they were back to 15 min I was pretty distraught. Then the next night went more like this I went to bed fine and woke up with terrible contractions! They were about 6 minutes apart but I tried not to get excited, but Jesse didn't get much sleep either. So as is protocol with my OB office soon as they opened I called to go get a labor check. Packed my bag and headed to the office! However nothing had changed, no more dilation no change in how often the contractions were coming no sign of leaking anything and baby was handling contractions well. So we went home.
Pretty much I was done. I put away any notion of using a stop watch and just went about what needed doing. Which was spending time with my family! My mom was here visiting and Jesse had the week off so we watched movies and shopped and things like that.
Early early Sunday morning the same thing woke me up, and I tried to get as much sleep as I could, positive it was another 'false alarm' One time during this alarm I went and used the bathroom, when I came back and sat down on the bed I felt a little trickle and to my self I was like "too good to be true that that could be my water breaking...so I'll assume it's nothing unless it happens again" then I changed my underwear and went back to bed. In the morning I told Jesse all about my rough night and decided I would let him make the decision whether to go into the hospital and get checked or not. He said "whats the worst that could happen we come home?" Yes that's exactly the worst that could happen went right through my head. But I called the office and sorta took my time getting my stuff together. Maia started freaking out (as had kinda been the thing over the past week) so when I got out to the car I didn't have the bag and thought Jesse would grab it. When we got there we realized neither of s had it. Then I was like "Oh well best way to get to stay is to come unprepared right?"
So I went about sitting in the observation room and nearly didn't mention the little gush I'd had early that morning. But I'd mentioned it to Jesse and he made sure I mentioned it. They were unimpressed but said they'd check for amniotic fluid anyway. I was still at a 4, discouraging, and after an hour of monitoring they told me to take a walk in the hall while waiting to see what the test said. We walked for a bit but then went back to the triage room and played hangman on the Kindle.
I was admitted and all set up in my room around 11am. They recommended breaking my water the rest of the way to get contractions rolling and I said sure. They were very impressed by the rupture and the I quote "waterfall" that ensued. Contractions sure did speed up! Every 3 minutes like instantly and holy cow were they different but I tried to endure. And after an hour or so I was pretty weak and had hardly progressed at all so I opted for an epidural. Lucky me the anesthesiologist was near by and I didn't have to wait too long by 1:45 it was in! Immediately contractions picked up to be a minute apart for about twenty minutes, I could still feel them, they just didn't hurt as bad, miraculous I tell you. They dimmed the lights and I tried to get some sleep, since I'd missed a bunch during the night anyway. 2:30pm they came to check on things and helped me adjust to a new position, then they needed to move the monitors to keep track of heartbeat etc. They checked me and I'd jumped to an 8 dilated! But as they were trying to get the monitor to pick up baby for more than a minute they had me shifting a lot and all that made me nauseated. So of course I threw up, but was glad I hadn't eaten for a few hours except for ice chips that made things not too yucky.
Since throwing up during labor is common and is known to cause dilating they went to check me again to see if it'd helped and whataya know there's a baby! So they went to get the baby team and all the gear and we all looked over at Jesse on the couch. He was keeping family updated as they were adjusting things, and missed the part where they said they could see baby's head. So he jumped up and came over and they got their stuff together and I started pushing. 20 minutes later Jesse was able to catch baby Londyn. She apparently was trying come out face up which is not good so everyone got to watch her turn herself 180 degrees to be in better position, there was lots of "I've never seen this" and "this is really amazing to watch" comments but I tried not to look too much into it :)
Londyn was born hungry! I was able to nurse her pretty much immediately, had to tear her away to clamp and cut the cord a while later. Once placenta was delivered they got a look at things, her cord was attached at the side (which made me nervous earlier on because of the same issue my friend had and she's lost 2...) but the sac was huge. There was so much fluid that it was keeping baby from coming on her own. She couldn't get pressure on the cervix like is needed cuz she was too afloat. But she did make it!
She had very big cheeks
notice my IV is slightly red there? Happens no big deal but when Maia got there she was FREAKED OUT! She wouldn't sit on my left side until they gave me a bandaid for it. HAH so cute that kid.
This was her first reaction to her sister. "EW she's dirty! You wash her off...bubble bath"
She was much more welcoming to her once she got her bath.
My Big little girl! She weighed in at 8lbs 7 oz a full pound and a half bigger than her sister was. But she was born AT 40 weeks and Maia was born at 38 so understandable.
She may have been more excited about the Ring Pop than anything else..
The Fox Family
Jesse, Stephanie Maia and Londyn
So that's "The Story" we went home tuesday that happened to be the first day of school (great timing she had right?) and my mom had to leave the next day! I had more than one meltdown thinking about it. I've survived better than I thought I would but its still rough. Getting used to sleep deprivation already. But it's okay, I signed up for this! And seeing my big girl give my little girl kisses and say "Oh Hello Baby Londyn!" and "Baby Londyn eats boobies, that yucky" makes it all ever so worth it.
another Soothie baby? At least I had more say in what kind she took to this time
Going Home!
First Nap at Home
And besides Mom and Dad Fox are going to be here next week so more help is on the way! And I have some great friends out here that have been great helping me out too. Makes me even more grateful for the Gospel and Organization of the church, you're never far from family, even when you are at least a two day drive away from most of your family.
We are so excited to have Londyn safe and sound at home, she is such a doll!
Saturday, March 3, 2012
Maternity Pics
So my awesome friend Becky and I have been doing some trades, I have been doing some sewing for her girls and she has been taking some awesome photos for us! She did our family shots in the fall and just last week she did my maternity photos (we squeezed a quick session in between final exams!) She is moving in just a few short weeks and I don't know what I'm gonna do with myself! SHe and her family have been so great to us we will miss them dearly! BUT we are SO excited for them and that they are graduating soon and moving on to do BIG things!!
We should have photos of the little legs and feet that go in those shoes soon!
Sunday, February 19, 2012
kinda annoyed and mostly grateful
So I had this whole awesome Christmas post I've been working on with photos and such to catch up on the fact that I haven't updated my bog in forever and guess whose computer died with it saved on it!!! ACK The only time live writer isn't nicer to use to write my blog...
So I am a little annoyed that our laptop has crashed and refuses to turn on because I was in the middle of transferring all of my photos videos (of my tiny baby Maia from the night before I had her to her first few hours!) and music when the computer decided it would chose that time to DIE. I nearly cried. There must be a way to get them back so I decided not to cry about it...yet. But until I figure that out I will be annoyed with it and keep it in the drawer in the desk downstairs. Laptop time out could work right?
So due to our lack of working computer our dear friend teeny decided he wanted to upgrade his mac and would gladly sell us his! Wow thanks Teeny! It's already got all the software and goodies you want on it so we wouldn't have to spend extra to get them after spending extra to get a new computer. Again Go Teeny!
That is not all for our expensive week! We are also the proud owners of a 2008 Honda Odyssey! Yes Jesse Fox owns a mini van, and he likes it A LOT! I truly never thought I'd see the day :) we weren't looking for a van specifically but lets face it they are convenient family vehicles. So we were just dream shopping (one of my favorite past times after all) and found ourselves at the dealership talking to a car guy! He had plenty to show us and was very willing to help us out. We were very impressed to see that we could totally afford this change!
Originally we were planning to trade in both our car and our truck. We still owed a bit on the car and the truck Jesse paid off while we were still dating. But unfortunately can't fit a family of 4 in a 1998 F150 with one bench seat. Not enough car seat room. Thus our thoughts to trade it in. We were looking into what we would need to do to get it imported and how long the process would take. Who better to call than the inlays who've totally done that more than once! So that's exactly what we did. AND they one upped us and offered to drive our truck up to Canada when the time comes to move!! Another one of our concerns with two vehicles was how do we move that far with one adult in each car and someone driving our stuff and not lose all our money paying for gasoline? Yeah so THANKS MOM AND DAD FOX! Truly I have married into an amazing family, I am grateful :)
So once we decided we were not gonna trade in the truck just the van we went and started collecting our downpayment from our savings. Saturday we went to the dealership sure that we could get things taken care of and still make it to my pregnancy photo shoot early that afternoon. Yeah its been that long since we've worked with getting a vehicle.
-side note-Why does it seem you are always hungry when dealing with car dealers? Maybe that's just me but you are there for so long there is always a meal missed causing more impatience...they should have more than a vending machine I mean I am spending thousands of dollars with you today you can afford to share with me that pizza I smell sitting behind that door (doubt not a pregnant woman's senses and abilities to find food in a time of such great need)
So 2 and a half hours into it and no end in site we called up our awesome photographer and she was totally cool with it! We are rescheduled for tuesday assuming baby doesn't come monday. If I'm in labor tuesday the photos may just not be quite as cute ;) So with that worry done we continued to wait on the car trade in. Note to selves don't buy a hyundai if you ever plan to trade it in they don't resale worth a snap! we barely got a little more than even with what we still owed! LAME but I'm sure they'd have pickled us out of as much on the truck as well. Good thing we didn't bother with the importing process on it. We learned I have awesome credit and J's is not quite as awesome because of the condo that has been in short sale negotiation for 12 months and counting (no end inside there yet either, anyone want to buy a condo in springville let us know we got a steal can hook you up with)3 hours and a frog balloon that Maia can make "go boing" later we totally have a van!
If the decision didn't feel so right we wouldn't have done it but lets face it everything was fitting so perfectly (even if time consumingly) that it couldn't be any better at this point. We are so blessed.
Even as students we've been able to get a new to us laptop and a new to us van all in one week! Now we just gotta make it through finals and well see when this little one decides to make an appearance. We know from ultrasound tech and midwife both doing position check that she has lots of hair! Not that we expected less but any details we can get we are excited about! I can't wait to meet my tiny dancer!
I have been extra thankful for things going so smoothly this pregnancy. My dear friend lost her second child and I cried so hard I started contracting.. and it was a few months ago. Another friend of mine has suffered through PUPP syndrome for 2 weeks before getting to meet her little guy, More recently another friend of mine's water had broken at 31 and a half weeks! She has been admitted to the hospital indefinitely. Hopefully they can keep her little guy inside until she reaches 34-35 weeks. Antibiotics to prevent the increased infection chances and steroids to help his lungs develop a little faster and lots of prayers of strength for her and her family! She is doing well and has been very healthy through her whole pregnancy which is probably why baby is still able to be inside her and doing so well!
It goes to show you never know what the Lord has in store for you, he can throw some mighty curve balls. All the better to be prepared for anything and keep a strong hold of your faith. Cuz sometimes that's the only thing that can get you through the rough patches.
Babies are such miracles. I can hardly wait to meet my newest sweetie! And I hope I never forget to be grateful for the many amazing blessings I've been granted and well blessed with.
So I am a little annoyed that our laptop has crashed and refuses to turn on because I was in the middle of transferring all of my photos videos (of my tiny baby Maia from the night before I had her to her first few hours!) and music when the computer decided it would chose that time to DIE. I nearly cried. There must be a way to get them back so I decided not to cry about it...yet. But until I figure that out I will be annoyed with it and keep it in the drawer in the desk downstairs. Laptop time out could work right?
So due to our lack of working computer our dear friend teeny decided he wanted to upgrade his mac and would gladly sell us his! Wow thanks Teeny! It's already got all the software and goodies you want on it so we wouldn't have to spend extra to get them after spending extra to get a new computer. Again Go Teeny!
That is not all for our expensive week! We are also the proud owners of a 2008 Honda Odyssey! Yes Jesse Fox owns a mini van, and he likes it A LOT! I truly never thought I'd see the day :) we weren't looking for a van specifically but lets face it they are convenient family vehicles. So we were just dream shopping (one of my favorite past times after all) and found ourselves at the dealership talking to a car guy! He had plenty to show us and was very willing to help us out. We were very impressed to see that we could totally afford this change!
Originally we were planning to trade in both our car and our truck. We still owed a bit on the car and the truck Jesse paid off while we were still dating. But unfortunately can't fit a family of 4 in a 1998 F150 with one bench seat. Not enough car seat room. Thus our thoughts to trade it in. We were looking into what we would need to do to get it imported and how long the process would take. Who better to call than the inlays who've totally done that more than once! So that's exactly what we did. AND they one upped us and offered to drive our truck up to Canada when the time comes to move!! Another one of our concerns with two vehicles was how do we move that far with one adult in each car and someone driving our stuff and not lose all our money paying for gasoline? Yeah so THANKS MOM AND DAD FOX! Truly I have married into an amazing family, I am grateful :)
So once we decided we were not gonna trade in the truck just the van we went and started collecting our downpayment from our savings. Saturday we went to the dealership sure that we could get things taken care of and still make it to my pregnancy photo shoot early that afternoon. Yeah its been that long since we've worked with getting a vehicle.
-side note-Why does it seem you are always hungry when dealing with car dealers? Maybe that's just me but you are there for so long there is always a meal missed causing more impatience...they should have more than a vending machine I mean I am spending thousands of dollars with you today you can afford to share with me that pizza I smell sitting behind that door (doubt not a pregnant woman's senses and abilities to find food in a time of such great need)
So 2 and a half hours into it and no end in site we called up our awesome photographer and she was totally cool with it! We are rescheduled for tuesday assuming baby doesn't come monday. If I'm in labor tuesday the photos may just not be quite as cute ;) So with that worry done we continued to wait on the car trade in. Note to selves don't buy a hyundai if you ever plan to trade it in they don't resale worth a snap! we barely got a little more than even with what we still owed! LAME but I'm sure they'd have pickled us out of as much on the truck as well. Good thing we didn't bother with the importing process on it. We learned I have awesome credit and J's is not quite as awesome because of the condo that has been in short sale negotiation for 12 months and counting (no end inside there yet either, anyone want to buy a condo in springville let us know we got a steal can hook you up with)3 hours and a frog balloon that Maia can make "go boing" later we totally have a van!
If the decision didn't feel so right we wouldn't have done it but lets face it everything was fitting so perfectly (even if time consumingly) that it couldn't be any better at this point. We are so blessed.
Even as students we've been able to get a new to us laptop and a new to us van all in one week! Now we just gotta make it through finals and well see when this little one decides to make an appearance. We know from ultrasound tech and midwife both doing position check that she has lots of hair! Not that we expected less but any details we can get we are excited about! I can't wait to meet my tiny dancer!
I have been extra thankful for things going so smoothly this pregnancy. My dear friend lost her second child and I cried so hard I started contracting.. and it was a few months ago. Another friend of mine has suffered through PUPP syndrome for 2 weeks before getting to meet her little guy, More recently another friend of mine's water had broken at 31 and a half weeks! She has been admitted to the hospital indefinitely. Hopefully they can keep her little guy inside until she reaches 34-35 weeks. Antibiotics to prevent the increased infection chances and steroids to help his lungs develop a little faster and lots of prayers of strength for her and her family! She is doing well and has been very healthy through her whole pregnancy which is probably why baby is still able to be inside her and doing so well!
It goes to show you never know what the Lord has in store for you, he can throw some mighty curve balls. All the better to be prepared for anything and keep a strong hold of your faith. Cuz sometimes that's the only thing that can get you through the rough patches.
Babies are such miracles. I can hardly wait to meet my newest sweetie! And I hope I never forget to be grateful for the many amazing blessings I've been granted and well blessed with.
Wednesday, December 7, 2011
10 years ago
December 23rd 2001
the day before Christmas Eve ten years ago was a HUGE day in my life. That was the day, well night really, we came home to our house on fire. I found my journal that I got recently after the fire and wanted to share what I wrote about it from then and what I remember about it now. I even have some photos from it. What was the worst thing ever at the time has come full circle now and I now can say that I am grateful for the experience.
I have been reading through the journal from that time and I really didn't write that much about it, I remember crying a lot when I wrote it but I remember more than I thought. So I'll record it here for the world to see :)
So Sunday December 23rd 2001 we were doing lots of baking after church for our friends and neighbors, we planned to do lots of deliveries Christmas Eve. We made like ten loaves of banana bread and a couple batches of fudge and started some butter softening for cookies. Yeah we were going ALL OUT. We got a call from Grandma Brown asking if we wanted to come over for hot chocolate. Game on! So we covered up the goodies, and my mom asked me to blow out the candles in the living room, and I didn't, then we loaded up in the car and went to Grandmas, she only lives about a mile away from our home, it's pretty great. We got there and had some snacks and hot chocolate and Grandma taught us some about candy making and we dipped some chocolates. We decided to put on It's a Wonderful Life, cuz we kids hadn't seen it before (and to be honest I have not watched it since...maybe this year we'll change that..). When the movie was over we decided we should probably head home it was nearly 11pm and we had deliveries to make the next day! And we'd be back for our Traditional Christmas Eve at Grandmas so all was well.
I still clearly remember all I wanted to do when we got home was brush my teeth! Hot chocolate tends to have that affect of making your teeth feel all fuzzy, especially the homemade yummy kind! So that's what I was thinking about, we turned into the culdesac and saw a guy running up the lawn yelling from his car. As we turned into the driveway I saw the yellow glow in the front window. That is NOT what the tree looked like when we left I thought as I realized what was happening. Then then the front window blew out! My dad jumped out of the car and ran into the garage yelling something along the lines of "where are the photo albums?!" and he fully intended to run inside our burning house to find them. But he burned his hand on the door knob.
The man in our front yard lives on the next corner and is a retired fire fighter, he smelled the smoke and went searching for the home on fire. He called 911 once he found our house and went yelling to see if anyone was inside when we pulled up. We called them again cuz it seemed like forever and they still weren't there, we could hear the sirens they just weren't anywhere near us. If you look from our upstairs windows you can see the firehouse, so we weren't sure what was taking so long. Meanwhile my dad was trying to get the hose to turn on, but it was frozen. We watch the fire truck take a wrong turn down the wrong Swansboro culdesac, one of the downfalls of Highlands Ranch and the way they gave nearly every street in my neighborhood the same or similar name. Our neighbors started to wake up hearing the commotion, some them started to come outside to see what was going on. The LeMons brought us kids inside and wrapped us up in blankets as the firetruck finally showed up. But we couldn't just sit inside their lovely home while ours was aflame only feet away. So we brought the blankets outside and had to watch what was happening.
As the firefighters were setting up a perimeter and hooking up their hoses our neighbors from behind us came running through the backyard, The Tureks. I remember Sarah just found me and came and hugged me, and that's when I lost it. I cried so hard. I remember the way the cold air burned my throat as I cried in the arms of my friend. Trying to pay attention to everything but I couldn't really see past my own tears. People were walking around and asking if we'd been inside and I couldn't say anything. Maybe I spoke but I don't recollect a word of it.
Once things started to whined down and we started to really feel the cold ( it was after all the middle of the night in the end of December) we went to the Tureks home to warm up. My grandparents came and picked us up from there. I remember my dad saying "Don't worry guys this will be fun! We get to live in a hotel for a few weeks and get all New stuff! All my life I've wanted ALL new stuff!" I think I did manage to laugh a little. Leave it to my dad :)
I slept on the big couch in my grandmas basement with Karly and I cried myself to sleep. The next morning our house was on the news, it was also in the paper. At that point they didn't know what had started the fire, just that it was under investigation. Remember when I said I didn't blow out the candles in the living room? The room where the fire was? Yeah who felt awesome...
As I got upstairs not knowing what I was supposed to do I couldn't really shower I didn't have any clothes, I still couldn't brush my teeth I still had no toothbrush at least I was at grandmas and so I had a bowl of cheerios. As I was eating the doorbell rang for the first time that day, and it was certainly not the last. Some members of our ward were on the porch with two duffle bags and said "We brought clothes where can we put them" and I guess the office cuz it's right near the entry way. Calls started coming what can we give, everyone that I answered I said toothbrush, that's all I wanted was to brush my teeth. So when we ended up with about 30 toothbrushes I took full responsibility, but was thrilled to have clean teeth! I remember going out shopping with my home teacher and his wife who also happened to be my beehive adviser Randy and Liesl Bailey. They bought us kids all something we could wear to church in a few days, even some hair clips. Randy's family had a house fire and he shared with me what they went through, and that it DOES get better. That helped a lot. Then we went back to my grandmas house.
I hardly recognized it.
The office right off the entry was now FULL of items donated to us by people from our ward and people who had heard what happened. My parents were bringing car loads of things home that people had dropped off in our yard, food storage, hot meals, money clothes, from people we didn't even know but had read the paper. We sure were able to feel the Christmas giving spirit. One gift I remember strongly someone rang the doorbell and I answered and a man dressed like Santa was wearing sunglasses was there, he said "The Browns?" I confirmed he handed me an envelope and said "Merry Christmas." And then he left. Inside the envelope was 6 $100 gift cards to Target. I couldn't even believe that just happened.
Our neighbors brought us Christmas presents, even our insurance agent brought us some presents. To look back on all that was given to us I have so much gratitude. I know I would do the same for anyone in the same situation. My parents would have done the same. And we were truly blessed.
Christmas Day came. My parents actually had to wake us up! It was nearly ten and all of us were still sleeping. We came downstairs and there were presents. There were presents for US. There was also a puppy. Santa fortunately enough kept everything hidden in the garage this year, so it was all safe. This was the year I got my sewing machine. We did have a few things in our basement that we were allowed to take too.
After Christmas morning it was time to go and see the house. It fairly normal looking on the outside except the front window was boarded up, making it extremely dark inside, after all there was no lights left inside.
She was tiny, and we named her Maggie. A Long haired Miniature Dachshund. Whom we had until she was 8. But here I am in my Christmas Eve jammies and robe (from the Tureks) and the puppy fit in my pocket!
The fire went out pretty quickly. One of the firefighters told me the smoke alarms were still going off when they got inside. So if we'd been home we'd have been warned. The upstairs was recorded at being 800 degrees (600 on main floor) so not a lot was saved, but they tried cleaning everything, majority of our photos were saved. So was it my fault after all?
No.
There were two spotlights lighting up the silk trees on either side of our Christmas tree, one of them just got too hot and too close to a present and it caught fire, ran up the cord and the couches and live tree were just great fuel unfortunately. Not that the yule log in the middle didn't help but they reassured me there was no way it could have started the fire. PHEW!
We lived at my grandmas a few more days, then insurance company was able to get us into a hotel for about a week. Then we found a rental house with which we filled with rented furniture, and dishes etc. It was strange. Never felt like home. We were able to rebuild! We were able to help in demolition, which lets face it was awesome. If you've met my Dad this wont surprise you but one day we were over there item-izing our belongings (ever stop to think about that one? Just what DO you own?) and my Dad says "Hey we don't have to be careful in here!" and throws a kitchen knife at the wall!! Directly over the fireplace to be exact. Then we went and drew a big target on the area, took out the knife drawer and said "whoever gets a bullseye gets ice cream"
Game.On.
It was very silly and very helpful at getting rid of some stress and anxiety. We all got ice cream, and none of us hit the bullseye.
We spent the next 4 months in the rebuilding process and moved in 2 days before my 14th birthday.
Later that year after moving in was when my mom was diagnosed with Colon Cancer. I remember about a year after the fire she said "You know I think part of why we had the fire was so we could redo the house and I could be the most comfortable here, I don't think I could have said the same with how things were before" We did to lots of changes and were able to upgrade a lot of the furniture thanks to Homeowners Insurance. At the time I couldn't feel thankful for much I didn't know how to yet. I was seeing a therapist and that kept me sane. But Now I see exactly what she ment. We were given so much, we were served. And it is something I am glad that I can be thankful for now, it's now an experience I've lived through and can reference without tears. It was stressful and terrible and I hope to never have to go through that again. But I grew from it, and I'm glad I can see that now.
So dear House on Swansboro ct, Happy 10 year Anniversary.
the day before Christmas Eve ten years ago was a HUGE day in my life. That was the day, well night really, we came home to our house on fire. I found my journal that I got recently after the fire and wanted to share what I wrote about it from then and what I remember about it now. I even have some photos from it. What was the worst thing ever at the time has come full circle now and I now can say that I am grateful for the experience.
I have been reading through the journal from that time and I really didn't write that much about it, I remember crying a lot when I wrote it but I remember more than I thought. So I'll record it here for the world to see :)
So Sunday December 23rd 2001 we were doing lots of baking after church for our friends and neighbors, we planned to do lots of deliveries Christmas Eve. We made like ten loaves of banana bread and a couple batches of fudge and started some butter softening for cookies. Yeah we were going ALL OUT. We got a call from Grandma Brown asking if we wanted to come over for hot chocolate. Game on! So we covered up the goodies, and my mom asked me to blow out the candles in the living room, and I didn't, then we loaded up in the car and went to Grandmas, she only lives about a mile away from our home, it's pretty great. We got there and had some snacks and hot chocolate and Grandma taught us some about candy making and we dipped some chocolates. We decided to put on It's a Wonderful Life, cuz we kids hadn't seen it before (and to be honest I have not watched it since...maybe this year we'll change that..). When the movie was over we decided we should probably head home it was nearly 11pm and we had deliveries to make the next day! And we'd be back for our Traditional Christmas Eve at Grandmas so all was well.
I still clearly remember all I wanted to do when we got home was brush my teeth! Hot chocolate tends to have that affect of making your teeth feel all fuzzy, especially the homemade yummy kind! So that's what I was thinking about, we turned into the culdesac and saw a guy running up the lawn yelling from his car. As we turned into the driveway I saw the yellow glow in the front window. That is NOT what the tree looked like when we left I thought as I realized what was happening. Then then the front window blew out! My dad jumped out of the car and ran into the garage yelling something along the lines of "where are the photo albums?!" and he fully intended to run inside our burning house to find them. But he burned his hand on the door knob.
The man in our front yard lives on the next corner and is a retired fire fighter, he smelled the smoke and went searching for the home on fire. He called 911 once he found our house and went yelling to see if anyone was inside when we pulled up. We called them again cuz it seemed like forever and they still weren't there, we could hear the sirens they just weren't anywhere near us. If you look from our upstairs windows you can see the firehouse, so we weren't sure what was taking so long. Meanwhile my dad was trying to get the hose to turn on, but it was frozen. We watch the fire truck take a wrong turn down the wrong Swansboro culdesac, one of the downfalls of Highlands Ranch and the way they gave nearly every street in my neighborhood the same or similar name. Our neighbors started to wake up hearing the commotion, some them started to come outside to see what was going on. The LeMons brought us kids inside and wrapped us up in blankets as the firetruck finally showed up. But we couldn't just sit inside their lovely home while ours was aflame only feet away. So we brought the blankets outside and had to watch what was happening.
As the firefighters were setting up a perimeter and hooking up their hoses our neighbors from behind us came running through the backyard, The Tureks. I remember Sarah just found me and came and hugged me, and that's when I lost it. I cried so hard. I remember the way the cold air burned my throat as I cried in the arms of my friend. Trying to pay attention to everything but I couldn't really see past my own tears. People were walking around and asking if we'd been inside and I couldn't say anything. Maybe I spoke but I don't recollect a word of it.
Once things started to whined down and we started to really feel the cold ( it was after all the middle of the night in the end of December) we went to the Tureks home to warm up. My grandparents came and picked us up from there. I remember my dad saying "Don't worry guys this will be fun! We get to live in a hotel for a few weeks and get all New stuff! All my life I've wanted ALL new stuff!" I think I did manage to laugh a little. Leave it to my dad :)
I slept on the big couch in my grandmas basement with Karly and I cried myself to sleep. The next morning our house was on the news, it was also in the paper. At that point they didn't know what had started the fire, just that it was under investigation. Remember when I said I didn't blow out the candles in the living room? The room where the fire was? Yeah who felt awesome...
As I got upstairs not knowing what I was supposed to do I couldn't really shower I didn't have any clothes, I still couldn't brush my teeth I still had no toothbrush at least I was at grandmas and so I had a bowl of cheerios. As I was eating the doorbell rang for the first time that day, and it was certainly not the last. Some members of our ward were on the porch with two duffle bags and said "We brought clothes where can we put them" and I guess the office cuz it's right near the entry way. Calls started coming what can we give, everyone that I answered I said toothbrush, that's all I wanted was to brush my teeth. So when we ended up with about 30 toothbrushes I took full responsibility, but was thrilled to have clean teeth! I remember going out shopping with my home teacher and his wife who also happened to be my beehive adviser Randy and Liesl Bailey. They bought us kids all something we could wear to church in a few days, even some hair clips. Randy's family had a house fire and he shared with me what they went through, and that it DOES get better. That helped a lot. Then we went back to my grandmas house.
I hardly recognized it.
The office right off the entry was now FULL of items donated to us by people from our ward and people who had heard what happened. My parents were bringing car loads of things home that people had dropped off in our yard, food storage, hot meals, money clothes, from people we didn't even know but had read the paper. We sure were able to feel the Christmas giving spirit. One gift I remember strongly someone rang the doorbell and I answered and a man dressed like Santa was wearing sunglasses was there, he said "The Browns?" I confirmed he handed me an envelope and said "Merry Christmas." And then he left. Inside the envelope was 6 $100 gift cards to Target. I couldn't even believe that just happened.
Our neighbors brought us Christmas presents, even our insurance agent brought us some presents. To look back on all that was given to us I have so much gratitude. I know I would do the same for anyone in the same situation. My parents would have done the same. And we were truly blessed.
Christmas Day came. My parents actually had to wake us up! It was nearly ten and all of us were still sleeping. We came downstairs and there were presents. There were presents for US. There was also a puppy. Santa fortunately enough kept everything hidden in the garage this year, so it was all safe. This was the year I got my sewing machine. We did have a few things in our basement that we were allowed to take too.
After Christmas morning it was time to go and see the house. It fairly normal looking on the outside except the front window was boarded up, making it extremely dark inside, after all there was no lights left inside.
She was tiny, and we named her Maggie. A Long haired Miniature Dachshund. Whom we had until she was 8. But here I am in my Christmas Eve jammies and robe (from the Tureks) and the puppy fit in my pocket!
the majority of the fire was here
Our Piano. Notice the basket next to it is completely untouched. Not even ash touched this basket, guess what was in it? The Ensign. There was literally a circle around it as if it had been in a fire proof bubble even that side of the piano was safe.
The only other thing untouched was under the Christmas tree, you see Mandy was getting her first set of Scriptures for Christmas, and all the wrapping was burned off but the book was completely unharmed.
We took this as a hint we should probably reading a little more.
Shelf above the window in Mandy's room
Similar shelf in Karlys room, both upstairs.
another of the entry way
Upstairs hallway, we only got a few of those books back, most of them were unable to be cleaned and thus were thrown out.
This rooms temperature was 600 degrees when the firemen got to it.
We had some laundry to fold. Notice the dead plant, on the other side of the door was one more untouched thing, the sister to that dead plant that my Mom got when she and my Dad were first married. It's still alive today.
Mantle and fire place on main floor
What was left of our Christmas Tree, we hadn't had a real tree in 4 years. I haven't had one since.
Can tell what some things were but mostly ash and melted wrapping paper.
No.
There were two spotlights lighting up the silk trees on either side of our Christmas tree, one of them just got too hot and too close to a present and it caught fire, ran up the cord and the couches and live tree were just great fuel unfortunately. Not that the yule log in the middle didn't help but they reassured me there was no way it could have started the fire. PHEW!
We lived at my grandmas a few more days, then insurance company was able to get us into a hotel for about a week. Then we found a rental house with which we filled with rented furniture, and dishes etc. It was strange. Never felt like home. We were able to rebuild! We were able to help in demolition, which lets face it was awesome. If you've met my Dad this wont surprise you but one day we were over there item-izing our belongings (ever stop to think about that one? Just what DO you own?) and my Dad says "Hey we don't have to be careful in here!" and throws a kitchen knife at the wall!! Directly over the fireplace to be exact. Then we went and drew a big target on the area, took out the knife drawer and said "whoever gets a bullseye gets ice cream"
Game.On.
It was very silly and very helpful at getting rid of some stress and anxiety. We all got ice cream, and none of us hit the bullseye.
We spent the next 4 months in the rebuilding process and moved in 2 days before my 14th birthday.
Later that year after moving in was when my mom was diagnosed with Colon Cancer. I remember about a year after the fire she said "You know I think part of why we had the fire was so we could redo the house and I could be the most comfortable here, I don't think I could have said the same with how things were before" We did to lots of changes and were able to upgrade a lot of the furniture thanks to Homeowners Insurance. At the time I couldn't feel thankful for much I didn't know how to yet. I was seeing a therapist and that kept me sane. But Now I see exactly what she ment. We were given so much, we were served. And it is something I am glad that I can be thankful for now, it's now an experience I've lived through and can reference without tears. It was stressful and terrible and I hope to never have to go through that again. But I grew from it, and I'm glad I can see that now.
So dear House on Swansboro ct, Happy 10 year Anniversary.
Monday, November 28, 2011
thankful
This year for Thanksgiving we kept things pretty small it was just us and uncle Teeny (cuz his wife was in Mongolia). We had a good time though! I made an Amazing turkey! If you haven't discovered a brined bird you should meet one, asap. I also made yam apple casserole (delicious) stuffing, green beans( not casserole kind) and a cherry blueberry pie, kinda happened on accident the pie but it was delicious anyway! I will be making a recipe tab on here to share my recipes for people interested :). And Teeny brought mashed potatoes gravy and the pumpkin pie. And our little family tradition Jesse made Fry Bread! Wont be sharing that recipe sorry folks, (I don't even know it! All his and his families) but know that it's delicious and maybe one day we'll have you over for some ;)
Anyway lots of yummy food and of course football if you know my J even a little bit you know there are lots of sports going on at our house. J has an injury from hockey he is trying to heal from so the boys didn't go to the turkey bowl this year instead they played football on the xbox and watched a game or two. Maia enjoyed it too, and her Tinker Bell Movies.
I just wanted to share a few things I feel especially thankful for this year. I have mentioned before my dear friend who lost her daughter just over a year ago, she was expecting a little boy this January but unfortunately tragedy struck again. Her little boy was still born at 29 weeks, the week before thanksgiving. When I heard the news my heart broke all over again for her and her family. I remember the pain I felt learning that my friend had suffered such a loss once, but to suffer the loss again double broke my heart! I think about her often and keep her family in my prayers. Especially this time of year it has made me especially thankful for my healthy little Maia who is getting so big! And that little one still growing and developing is progressing well. Although I still feel a little paranoid at times about all the what if's I know the Lord will take care of us, whatever happens. And I know he is taking care of them friends of mine too!! I think daily of ideas of things I want to do for them but I am waiting for the right idea to strike me.
I am thankful for my Parents. I love my Mom and Dad. They are just so great ya know? My mom helped me TONS with organizing my house while she was able to visit after Halloween. and my Dad is just as great even if he wasn't able to come help this time. My daughter loves them so much its adorable when she talks about Yaya and Papa and their doggie 'Nielnen' (Melvin), but I am married and have more than two parents! I am a lucky girl to four of them! My fox Mom and Dad are quite amazing as well! They have been sp supportive to us while we are way out here in Iowa. After all they've been through the program too, they know just how crazy it can be! Even though we don't get to see our families as much as we'd like to we still love them and think about them often. Maia includes them in every prayer we say :) (also DARLING to hear her say prayers!).
And I have many many siblings we love and care about and MISS so much too! My siblings and Jesse's and all their respective spouses and children. Such a large family I have and am grateful to be a part of.
PIE
Anyway lots and lots more has been going on too! I am still in Primary and enjoying it very much we are currently getting things ready for the New Year, LOTS of work but it's worth it. ICAA has been equally busy we did a fundraising Holiday Bazaar of sorts and it was fun! Wish we'd have sold a little more BUT we will do another for sure! Our shirts for this year came in and are so awesome I'm excited to start handing them out this week! AND we have Christmas break coming up NEXT WEEK!! So easy to fall behind blogging, but inexcuseable because I check blogger like all the time...Ugh I'll do better :) Lots to update for Christmas time with the 10 year anniversary of my families house fire when I was younger, and Lib's wedding! I will have PLENTY to write about, and some photos to share too!
Anyway lots of yummy food and of course football if you know my J even a little bit you know there are lots of sports going on at our house. J has an injury from hockey he is trying to heal from so the boys didn't go to the turkey bowl this year instead they played football on the xbox and watched a game or two. Maia enjoyed it too, and her Tinker Bell Movies.
I just wanted to share a few things I feel especially thankful for this year. I have mentioned before my dear friend who lost her daughter just over a year ago, she was expecting a little boy this January but unfortunately tragedy struck again. Her little boy was still born at 29 weeks, the week before thanksgiving. When I heard the news my heart broke all over again for her and her family. I remember the pain I felt learning that my friend had suffered such a loss once, but to suffer the loss again double broke my heart! I think about her often and keep her family in my prayers. Especially this time of year it has made me especially thankful for my healthy little Maia who is getting so big! And that little one still growing and developing is progressing well. Although I still feel a little paranoid at times about all the what if's I know the Lord will take care of us, whatever happens. And I know he is taking care of them friends of mine too!! I think daily of ideas of things I want to do for them but I am waiting for the right idea to strike me.
I am thankful for my Parents. I love my Mom and Dad. They are just so great ya know? My mom helped me TONS with organizing my house while she was able to visit after Halloween. and my Dad is just as great even if he wasn't able to come help this time. My daughter loves them so much its adorable when she talks about Yaya and Papa and their doggie 'Nielnen' (Melvin), but I am married and have more than two parents! I am a lucky girl to four of them! My fox Mom and Dad are quite amazing as well! They have been sp supportive to us while we are way out here in Iowa. After all they've been through the program too, they know just how crazy it can be! Even though we don't get to see our families as much as we'd like to we still love them and think about them often. Maia includes them in every prayer we say :) (also DARLING to hear her say prayers!).
And I have many many siblings we love and care about and MISS so much too! My siblings and Jesse's and all their respective spouses and children. Such a large family I have and am grateful to be a part of.
PIE
I got creative with left over Cranberries :)
Perfect.
Our Holiday Feast!
Had to tear them away from the football ;)
LEFT OVERS! Left over wreath is my tradition, its delicious, almost as exciting as dinner the first time around.
Anyway lots and lots more has been going on too! I am still in Primary and enjoying it very much we are currently getting things ready for the New Year, LOTS of work but it's worth it. ICAA has been equally busy we did a fundraising Holiday Bazaar of sorts and it was fun! Wish we'd have sold a little more BUT we will do another for sure! Our shirts for this year came in and are so awesome I'm excited to start handing them out this week! AND we have Christmas break coming up NEXT WEEK!! So easy to fall behind blogging, but inexcuseable because I check blogger like all the time...Ugh I'll do better :) Lots to update for Christmas time with the 10 year anniversary of my families house fire when I was younger, and Lib's wedding! I will have PLENTY to write about, and some photos to share too!
Wednesday, November 9, 2011
What to do when you wake up in the Kitchen
I have been told I talk in my sleep, I have sat up and yelled at my dog that was not there in my sleep, even sent a few text messages in my sleep but I haven't ever been caught sleep walking until last night. So I had just brought my daughter back to her bed, she needed a little cuddle time in the middle of the night, and was having trouble getting back to sleep, or so I thought.
I heard a cabinet door close in my kitchen! I sat up and said "Jesse someones downstairs!"
He replies "Dang kids! I'll show 'em!" At which point he jets off down the stairs and I heard a few slapping sounds, and a "Bad Dog!" then another slap or two and a dog growling, then some pummeling noises.
"Come on down!" was next so I started off down the stairs and the floor and stairs seemed especially loud to be sneaky going down to see what was going on.
I couldn't see anyone, so I turned on the lights and still nothing so I figured J probably wasn't telling me to come down he was telling intruder and his dog to go down to the basement so I peeked out the window and there was also nothing there, I kept thinking "what is the world is going on?! What a crazy night!" Then I hesitated towards the stairs and turned on the light, SURPRISE there was nobody there!! And no one had been there! I still couldn't realize that what I thought had happened was all in my head, so I went back up stairs, but not before peeking out the window in the front to see if just in case J was out there with a culprit. Still no one there.
I turned off the lights and went back upstairs, only to find my husband sound a sleep in our bed.
I said allowed "wait how did you get up here so fast?" and he didn't even stir.
I layed back down in my bed realizing that it had all been a dream! My heart was pounding and I could not get back to sleep, after not too long J got up and was surprised I was awake so I told him about my dream before her got ready for school.
Things I should have realized? My husband keeps a sword under our bed for such occasions as intruders, even if we hear something outside he grabs it. I think its cute and manly, in the dream he didn't grab his sword RED FLAG also when he ran downstairs the floors didn't squeak. If you've been to my house you'd know that's impossible even the toddler makes the floors squeak. So when I became conscious in the kitchen when I turned on the light I should have just gotten a snack and gone back to bed. Instead I tried to tell myself I wasn't crazy something must have been going on, something was going on I was walking (and searching) in my sleep. So if YOU wake up one day in your kitchen, just grab a snack that's worth getting up for :)
I heard a cabinet door close in my kitchen! I sat up and said "Jesse someones downstairs!"
He replies "Dang kids! I'll show 'em!" At which point he jets off down the stairs and I heard a few slapping sounds, and a "Bad Dog!" then another slap or two and a dog growling, then some pummeling noises.
"Come on down!" was next so I started off down the stairs and the floor and stairs seemed especially loud to be sneaky going down to see what was going on.
I couldn't see anyone, so I turned on the lights and still nothing so I figured J probably wasn't telling me to come down he was telling intruder and his dog to go down to the basement so I peeked out the window and there was also nothing there, I kept thinking "what is the world is going on?! What a crazy night!" Then I hesitated towards the stairs and turned on the light, SURPRISE there was nobody there!! And no one had been there! I still couldn't realize that what I thought had happened was all in my head, so I went back up stairs, but not before peeking out the window in the front to see if just in case J was out there with a culprit. Still no one there.
I turned off the lights and went back upstairs, only to find my husband sound a sleep in our bed.
I said allowed "wait how did you get up here so fast?" and he didn't even stir.
I layed back down in my bed realizing that it had all been a dream! My heart was pounding and I could not get back to sleep, after not too long J got up and was surprised I was awake so I told him about my dream before her got ready for school.
Things I should have realized? My husband keeps a sword under our bed for such occasions as intruders, even if we hear something outside he grabs it. I think its cute and manly, in the dream he didn't grab his sword RED FLAG also when he ran downstairs the floors didn't squeak. If you've been to my house you'd know that's impossible even the toddler makes the floors squeak. So when I became conscious in the kitchen when I turned on the light I should have just gotten a snack and gone back to bed. Instead I tried to tell myself I wasn't crazy something must have been going on, something was going on I was walking (and searching) in my sleep. So if YOU wake up one day in your kitchen, just grab a snack that's worth getting up for :)
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